This morning I woke up craving donuts like crazy, but didn’t wanna deal with yeast dough nonsense. Scrolled through my pantry and spotted that dusty can of biscuits hiding behind flour – bingo! Thought: why not try making cheater donuts?
Gathering My Stuff
Ransacked the kitchen for supplies:
- One can of flaky biscuits (any cheap brand works)
- Half-bottle vegetable oil (almost used motor oil accidentally!)
- Cinnamon sugar mix from last week’s french toast disaster
- Powdered sugar with ants crawling on it – just blew them off, no biggie
Frying Time Shenanigans
Poured oil into my smallest pot until it looked deep enough. While heating, popped the biscuit tube – scared the cat with that loud bang. Took each biscuit and smashed my thumb through the middle to make holes, saved those nuggets for later.
Oil started smoking a bit – tossed a dough hole in as sacrifice. It bubbled instantly so I went full send. Dropped three biscuits in the pot using tongs. Big mistake! They stuck together like glue and turned into one mutant donut. Fished it out with a fork and scalded my pinky. Switched to frying solo pieces.
Finishing Touches Chaos
Laid paper towels on a plate (didn’t have racks). As soon as each golden donut came out, shook them in a ziplock bag with cinnamon sugar. Half the bag exploded – sugar carnage all over the counter. For glaze, mixed powdered sugar with drops of water until it looked like wet cement. Dipped some donuts – glaze slid off like water on duck feathers.
Final result? Wonky-looking donuts with sugar craters and weird bumps. But holy smokes – piping hot fresh donuts in 15 minutes! That first bite of soft, greasy goodness made my kitchen disaster totally worth it. Even the burnt mutant donut tasted amazing. Pro tip: forget perfection, just shovel these in your face while they’re hot!
